Crossroads

Funny how I thought I knew
What love and pain were all about?
I swore that no matter what
I would not pass this way again.
To guard my heart was my intent
To keep it safe within myself
But somehow in the unplanned night
I lost it without meaning to
Only to find it shattered in pieces
Dropped by hands that never meant to harm
Three times in my life
I have written this poem
First in college, then the Upper Room,
But I never dreamed that it all could end
When trying so hard to do what was right?
It is for the best, I know that’s true
I am not what he needs to fill his life
And he would be so sad to know
That he was the reason for this pain.
So I will do my best to hold my tongue
And never tell him how I feel,
But how do I find the strength to face tomorrow
Or the day after that
When the last of my hope
Walked out the door and never looked back?
Selfish I know to think of myself,
But facing the shadows in the endless night
Without any light to give me hope
I find not the strength to rise above
Drowning in an ocean of loss and alone in the dark.
I only have one thing left to hold
My faith that God will end this pain
And will somehow bring back the light.
For time, despite the words old wives would bring,
Does not heal wounds that go this deep
And only God can bring me peace.

01/01/09