Lost in the Swamp

I rocked the boat
I caused the crash
I am responsible
For the shattered remains.

I knew the risk
But in seeking my hope
I lost something more precious
Than the jewel that I sought.

Only now in the darkness
Do I see the true loss
Of a treasure more valuable
Than delusion or dream.

Dear God up in heaven
Please bind up the broken
Repair what was damaged
Restore what was lost.

I followed my own path
Chasing will-o-wisp promises,
And now find myself
All alone in the night.

The blame is all mine,
Still I beg for Your Mercy
And pray for Your Grace
To heal and restore.

I repent the self-seeking
And ask for forgiveness,
For You are my only hope
Of receiving true love.

03/17/09

Love is patient, Love is kind, It does not envy, it does not boast, It is not proud, It is not rude, It is not self-seeking, It is not easily angered, It keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil, but rejoices with the truth.Love always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love never ends. Corinthians 13 : 4 - 8

Game Over

Empty.
Everything is empty.
The past is a blood-splattered path
Of broken hopes and empty dreams.
The present a spinning maelstrom
Of loss and loneliness
And the future stretches ahead
More empty than all that has come before.
Hopeless.
Empty.
Dead.

Close the Circle

Empty echoes where once a heart
Was filled with soundings of well-loved voices.
How many times have I come this way?
The count so high the pattern now set.
An endless circle of love and loss
Peers and schoolmates lost into time
Beloved companions that rode off in the night
And now kindred spirits that fade in the wind
Leaving me behind as they forge their own lives.
Nothing traumatic, no hurricane or disasters,
Just voices going silent in the expansion of time
Taking with them their pieces of my much broken heart
Until only the scattered fragments remain.
All that is left are the pieces unwanted
I gather them close as I bathe them with tears.
And promise them all that no more will I offer
As I crawl within my soul and shut the door.
And the circle closes one last time.

Rebecca
03/07/09